Will life just go back to normal again or will there always be that "fear" that it will come back? Do you panic with every sniffle/ache/slight pain? Can you ever fully relax? I am sure there are those of you reading this who can offer me some kind of answer to my questions but I know that for everyone their experiences differ greatly.
I have an inspiration, a lady called Helen (I hope she does not mind me mentioning her) . We have never met yet I look up to her and look to her as an example of strength and courage. We "met" via the internet long before Rich was ill. She has been there and won her fight with cancer and has gone on to have a beautiful little boy so I guess that is proof that there certainly is life after cancer. She, along with many other of my lovely friends, has been there every step of the journey to offer support and guidance and to give me a patients perspective to help me understand tough times that little bit better.
For now though this is just a dream, something to look forward to. A time where we are not counting down to the next chemo or blood test, a time when we can make plans and not worry about how it fits into treatment and hospital appointments.
We have a holiday booked for September, our first since the diagnosis and since Richie was born. This cant come soon enough and I live in hope that Rich is well enough to enjoy it too.